Written originally by Bernard on the forum on 24 Oct 2007 at 09:01 AM
Ok, so I'm finding I'm having a little trouble communicating with others about my situation/experience. It seems that whenever I try and explain what it is I'm doing with myself I always fall short. And when someone expresses interest in what I'm speaking about and wants me to elaborate, Its seems no matter how hard I try I can never actually bring any clarity to the situation. Perhaps this is because I myself have not reached any point of clarity within myself. I wonder how long it will be before I can really offer any assistance to anyone. It seems like its better just to keep my mouth shut rather than confuse the shit out of the people I speak to as well as just frustrate and confuse myself further. Sometimes the only thing I can truly express to anyone is that, I'm confused. What is confusion.
Confusion is when the rebound flod of self as subconscious within the unconscious challenge the "choices" you consider in re self definition --that is one of the purposes of the breathing exercise with the choice between self honesty and self dishonesty in every moment-- writing about it then become the correction and integration as one of the subconscious--thus start writing to yourself about yourself and in the writing place the choices as statements of yourself very clearly--read it and if you are not satisfied with you self expression--do it again--be carefull though not to judge ypourself for your expression as it is a process--you will also find lots of anxiety when you read your own writing as you will be subconsciously self critical as to where you are not following preprogramming which will come up as "what will people think of me" and related enslavement thoughts
do self forgiveness and push yourself beyond these points--it is like walking through the fear and is very liberating once yourealise how easy it really ease/is
I think the trickey part for me is that i often dont see any choices so i am not sure what to "place" as myself.
In not seeing a choice is a choice--if I choose to continue to confuse myself--All you experience you create yourself--and the unconscious -which is the manifested world all agree to --flows at times through the subconscious-which is your accepted self created without awareness personality and self image- which allows you to clarify and redefine yourself through self directed choice
obviously nothing will come up--you have to chose it--if something come up and you follow it--you are the slave again
so--when confusion arise--it reflects on self image as the accepted inability to direc t yourself or take responsibility for yourself--are you accepting that about yourself-- see it in a way that you have only the breath to live--choose what and who to be immediately--do not think about it or you screw yourself up--not that you are not screwed up already-- but--in realising your screwed upness--direct yourself in the moment that unfold--
and I choose these words specific--you react to it--write down what you react to--do self forgiveness--and the write down new statements about yourself--
All challenges--is you being challenged as who you accepted yourself to be-- so what have you allowed yourself to become?
is this you acceptable to you?
what are you going to do about you and what yoiu accept about you?
there will always be a pattern--so --identify the confusion pattern in your life--all patterns are programms-- life is unpredictable and confusing to the mind--so--life cannot be thought up!!!